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One of the most common reasons couples get stuck in their sex lives has nothing to do with attraction, effort, or love. It might be that they’re working with two different types of desire and don’t know it. When couples understand this, things soften fast. Less blame. Less pressure. More clarity. More connection.   Type 1: Desire that shows up first For some people, desire arrives out of nowhere. They think about sex. They feel drawn to their partner. They get turned on. And